The Magnificent Destiny of the Glorious and Famous T.T. Tatum

If you ever see a walking giant hat wondering the streets of your town, along with a pair of old shoes, do not be very surprised. Meet T.T. Tatum.

T.T. Tatum was not born like every other boy. He was spit out by his mother through her mouth. Born for an extraordinary life, T.T. was forgotten in his carriage during his daily walk in the park, for three weeks. When they finally remembered they had a child, his parents found T.T. surrounded by dogs… “Like a king by his subjects,” they said, after they cleaned him up and revived him.

At 10 years old, T.T. Tatum was already the leader of the other children. He led them in many glorious games, in which he was the ball. At the age of 18, knowing he was destined to be a great man, he joined the Army with the help of a few strong sidekicks who held his hand while signing the papers. The Army, recognizing his natural talent for leadership, promoted him at once to Commander in Chief in charge of the latrines.

After he was discharged, he began another glorious career as a businessman. T.T. Tatum became, in a short time, the first man who owned more than 200 useless metal buckets, and he proudly possessed a multimillion-dollar debt.

He finally died, ending his marvelous existence and fantastic destiny by being run over by a providential truck. His great friends who supported him throughout his entire life have made the arrangements for a fastuous funeral, as a great man deserves. A wooden old wardrobe was the proud preserver of T.T. Tatum’s body and the text on the tombstone attracted the attention of everyone who passed that side of the graveyard, letting people know that this has been no ordinary man: “Here lies T.T. Tatum. A great ball.”

But if you ever see a walking giant hat wondering the streets of your town, along with a pair of old shoes, do not be very surprised — T.T. Tatum is back.

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